Reacting or Responding: How to Identify When You Are Reacting
At a glance, responding and reacting may seem like the same thing. However, under the surface, responding and reacting is very different.
Respond or responding is defined as – saying something in return: making an answer, responding to criticism, and – showing a favorable reaction – to be answerable.
In my words, a conscious choice to complete a motion, activity, or task.
The Oxford English Dictionary defines reacting as the following:
Respond or behave in a particular way in response to something.
respond with hostility, opposition, or a contrary course of action to
When a person reacts instead of acting right, they respond to external stimuli and are not consciously making a choice or completing an intended action.
From time to time, we will have moments of reaction instead of responding. This is expected because we are humans.
Humans get surprised or overwhelmed in situations and just let our emotions out. While this may happen periodically, it does not feel great and worsens the situation.
How can you tell if you are emotionally reacting or simply responding? Below are some signs that you may be reacting instead of responding.
Feelings of Stress, Anxiety, or Anger:
The first sign you may be reacting instead of responding is if you are experiencing feelings of stress, anxiety, or anger. The body will activate the stress response anytime it perceives a threat. Your heart rate may increase, your body temperature may rise, and you may experience a head or stomach ache.
While this response is helpful in life-or-death situations, it can also cause a person to react irrationally. To be in control, stop, breathe, think, then respond. You can be upset, frustrated, or anxious in a situation or front of a person and answer correctly.
A Triggered reaction:
The second sign you possibly are reacting instead of responding is if you are being triggered. Each person has their trigger points. These points are different for each person based on their background and life experiences thus far. Triggers have a tendency to make a person overly sensitive or engage in an intense response.
This is because your subconscious says, I've seen this before, and here is how to handle this.
This reaction can be targeted outward at other people or inward at themself. If you are responding to a situation, event, or person and are overly sensitive or extremely passionate, you may be reacting instead of acting responsibly and in control.
The Hungry Reacting
The third sign you may be reacting to instead of responding is if you are hungry.
Everyone has experienced or heard of the term “Hangry.”
Hangry is “bad-tempered or irritable as a result of hunger.” Though not an excuse, having not eaten can cause low blood sugar. This can cause the same hormones to be released when you're stressed or anxious.
This hormone can lead to impulsive or aggressive behavior. If you are hungry and in a situation, event, or person, examine your actions; you may be reacting.
Being Tired
The fourth sign that you may react instead of respond is when you are tired. Sleeping allows the body time to relax, refresh, and recharge psychically, emotionally, and mentally.
Research has shown that the brain can be up to 60% more reactive without sleep. This is because it's more challenging to produce rational and appropriate responses when tired.
In a situation, event, or person where there is a confrontation, and you feel edgy because of a lack of rest, you most likely will react improperly.
Other signs of reacting instead of acting include the following:
- Needing an exact or perfect outcome
- Difficulties accepting the current situation
- Inability to recognize different perspectives
Suppose you experience frequent signs of reaction or find that your responses are disruptive to your ability to function day to day. In that case, you may benefit from contacting and working with a mental health professional.
Feelings Are Valid
Reacting and acting both involve feelings, understanding that adjusting your responses to acting instead of reacting does not imply that your feelings are not valid. While feelings may have validity, managing and productively expressing them is essential. This will allow you to control your emotions and while positively benefit your mental
Learning to respond instead of reacting as your primary responsibility will help you build relationships with others, be productive, and lead a fulfilling life.
I am here for your success.
Thank You
Baxter Cribbs
For more on being able to respond in a difficult situation or life in general, you may find this free short video on Increasing Resilience super helpful. just enter your best email below to receive the link and pass word to the video
